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How often do you get rejected? What is your usual response or interpretation every time you get rejected?

Without a doubt, rejection is one of the last form of experiences we ever want to come across in life. Whether it’s through a job opportunity, school admission, relationships, family, friends, it’s a feeling we hardly ever expect. We always want to believe we are valuable and expect others around us to feel we are as well. Unfortunately, rejection seems to be inevitable and something we will probably have to deal with often. However, what’s more important is how we respond whenever we feel rejected. Whether or not we are capable of deciphering any possible messages accompanying such rejections.

The good news is rejection is never indicative of lack of self-worth. Whenever we feel rejected, we are denied the opportunity we feel we deserve. When we are rejected by friends, family, we are rejected by people who don’t appreciate our values. People who deny to give us the opportunity to explore our full potentials. We are not rejected because we are worthless. Every human is blessed with something unique and special, different from any other. Unfortunately, some just don’t discover it early or are prevented from discovering it due to different circumstances.

Rejection should not always be considered negative as we often do. In fact depending on whether we are willingor not, to uncover the underlying message of every rejection, rejection itself could be a blessing in disguise. As we all know, life communicates with us using situations and rejection is one of such channels.

Below are some suggested messages underlying any rejection:

1. Competence.

The reality is we will come across situations in which our competence on different aspects of life is put to test. This is common in the corporate world. Regardless of whether or not our competence fairly judged, we ought to consider the following reasons:

Maybe we are

  • not competent pertaining to what’s being demanded.
  • trying to become what we don’t really excel at or
  • have a different purpose other than what we believe in.

Irrespective of the situation you find yourself, in which you are rejected based on competence, it has to be an opportunity to communicate with yourself properly. Trying to find possible answers to the situation you are going through and at the same time improving where you can. The truth is we have to deal with the fact we will face situations beyond our control. If we don’t try to control what is within our reach, we don’t help ourselves moving forward. Rejection based on competence is sometimes subjective but addresses specific aspects of someone rather than self-worth as some feel.

2. Value.

Believe it or not, everyone is born with intrinsic and very unique qualities. Even the mad man on the street was born with something special even though others consider them worthless. The simple fact one is rejected or considered valueless does not signify they have no value. They are not just appreciated by a particular set of people. Unfortunately, some don’t get to discover who they really are and what they can offer. This is either due to the fact they are prevented by circumstances or spend their time seeking other’s accreditation for their values. The advise I usually give is the world we live in has a diverse population worth 7 billion people. You don’t believe rejection from 10 or 20 equals rejection from the world. You are simply not appreciated. To feel appreciated, you have to first of all appreciate yourself as long as you give room for the need to always improve.

3. Self discovery.

Rejections are sometimes part of the journey to self discovery. People get to discover who they really are as well as where they are heading to after series of rejections. This led to them doing more self-reflection thereby bring out the best in them. Becoming more confident in themselves and better in decision-making. It can also bring about creativity, after consistently trying without success. In this case we get to discover where we really excel at and try to improve on them.

4. More opportunities.

As earlier mentioned, sometimes rejections are blessings in disguise. They lead us to greater opportunities we wouldn’t have ever discovered if never been rejected. They permit one discover purpose,where they can greatly excel in which are products of self-reflection and the continues search for opportunities.

Just like failure or discouragement, rejection can be empowered depending on how we make them to be. Meaning, they are subjective and never always negative signs as we often depict them. Even though they often present themselves in situations we never expect, we can try to uncover the underlying messages when they present themselves. Sometimes these messagewills are usually for our best interest and the only ways we could move to a higher stage is through the stepping stone of rejection.